Wesley Corpus

Faith is so far from being only this desire that it is no desire at all. It differs from all desire toro genere, although doubtless all good desires accompany it. It is, according to St. Paul, an ’e an ‘evidence’ or ‘conviction’ (which is totally different from a desire) ‘of things not seen,’ a supernatural, a divine evidence and conviction of the things which God hath revealed in His Word; of this in particular, that the Son of God hath loved me and given Himself for me. Whosoever hath this faith is born of God. Whosoever thus believeth is saved; and if he endure therein to the end, shall be saved everlastingly. The process of this work in the soul, of the present salvation which is through faith, you likewise describe confusedly and obscurely. The sum of what you say is this: ‘The painful sense of what you are, kindled into a working state of sensibility by the light of God, is the light and fire from whence the spirit of prayer proceeds. In its first kindling nothing is found but pain, wrath, and darkness; and therefore its first prayer is all humility.’ (Part II. p. 172.) Would it not be more intelligible if one had said, ‘The convincing Spirit of God gives you to see and feel that you are a poor, undone, guilty, helpless sinner; at the same time He incites you to cry for help to Him who is “mighty to save”’ This is true. But it is not true that in the first kindling of this fire, in plain terms, during the first convictions, ‘nothing is found but pain, wrath, and darkness.’ Very often there are found even in the first conviction sweet gleams of light, touches of joy, of hope, and of love, mixed with sorrow and fear. Much less is it true that the first prayer of an awakening sinner is all humility (ibid.). On the contrary, a sinner newly awakened has always more or less confidence in himself, in what he is, or has, or does, and will do; which is not humility, but downright pride. And this mingles itself with all his prayer till the day-star is just rising in his heart.